Fonzie

It’s the night of June 10, 2019.  I’m watching Game 5 of the NBA Finals on my phone as I board a plane to Paris with my Golden State Warriors cap on, absorbing all my anxious yet hopeful sweat.

Kevin Durant ruptured his Achilles in the second quarter of this very game.  Not only is he out for the game and the rest of the series, he’s out next season as well.  We’re down 6 with 2:31 left in the 4th.  With the Raptors up 3-1 in the series, it’s win or lose the championship.

You can’t find more accurate words for this than “emotionally taxing”, other than “fucking emotionally taxing.”  Probably.

If you’re a fan of the NBA you probably know the rest of the story – the Dubs find a way to pull out a win and force a Game 6 back in Oakland.  The flight from San Francisco to Paris is approximately ten hours long.  Suffice to say, a loss here would have made this the worst flight of my life.  With the help of the Warriors, no one else was happier on that plane than me, cheesing harder than provolone sitting in seat 30D.

Well, no one except for the big burly man that took seat 30C, who laid his head ever so gently on my right shoulder and slept like a big ass baby well over half of the entire flight.  Dude didn’t even buy me a dinner or a drink, or give me his name.  He just Paul Anka’ed (1) himself and took my shoulder for his pillow.  But I didn’t care.  The Warriors won that night and was fully convinced we’d win Game 6 in Oakland, consequently forcing Game 7 back in Toronto to defend our NBA Championship and seal our 3-peat (we didn’t).

Let’s rewind some.

It’s the night of August 22, 2017.  I’m on a business trip, and Minneapolis is a frequent destination.  After back to back long days, I decided to take in a ballgame at Target Field with the Minnesota Twins hosting the Cleveland Indians.  Granted, I’m a Giants fan, proudly being the only one in this house donning my black and orange baseball cap.  But, I love baseball wholeheartedly, so I’m all for in any chance I can get to lay my eyes on live ballgame and my lips on a beer and a hotdog.

The stadium is a few thousand away from an officially packed house, with small patches of empty seats here and there.  The seat to my left remained open for the entirety of the game, and to the right of me what I assumed to be either a Twins or Indians fan.  He didn’t have a hat on to confirm this, nor did he react in a way where it was clear he was rooting for one over the other.  I played a simple game of roulette – he was either going to be black or red.

“I can’t believe Bartolo Colon is still pitching in this league,” he says toward me, attempting to jumpstart a conversation.

“There’s always a market open for a former Cy Young winner (2),” I replied.

“Even if their weight is equivalent to a sumo wrestler?” he says.  “His jersey is barely tucked in!”

“Look at it this way, he’ll stop all grounders up the middle with his gut.  He can win a gold glove with that thing!” I said.  We share a laugh.  We exchange names, his is Jason.

Well, you know who I am.

“So you’re a Giants fan?  Are you from here?” Jason asks me.

“I am, I’m actually here on a business trip.  I live in SF.  Just decided to catch a ballgame since I had the chance to.”

“Yeah I had to figure you weren’t a local.  I live in Vegas,” Jason replies.  “I’m also here on a business trip.  Same, decided to catch the ballgame, except I’m a Dodgers fan.”

Remember that little roulette game I played in my head earlier?  This is when the ball lands on 00… on a completely different roulette table from across the room next to the penny slot machines.

What are the odds that, out of 30,000 mid-westerners, two guys on a business trip from the west coast end up picking two seats next to each other and happen to be opposite fans of one of the most heated rivalries in baseball history?  I’m actually sure Sabermetrics has this answer to the decimal, but I’ll make an educated guess that it’s not very high.

“No fucking way!” I say laughingly.  This beer is well engaged with my system by now.  “God, what are the odds? This is funny.”

You should understand that since I was a child, I’ve grown to feel within the fibers of my being that the Dodgers were the ultimate, hated enemy.  The Joker against Batman.  Thanos against the Avengers.  The root of all things evil, like inserting mayonnaise in between your peanut butter and jelly sandwich.

The Dodgers are that mayonnaise and they ruin everything that is joyful and pure on God’s green earth.  Why oh why, Jesus H. Christ, did this guy have to sit next to me?!

I’m totally kidding.  This is a rivalry I respect and love.  I’ve met highly savory Dodger fans in my life (like the Pantone294 crew [3]) and Jason is this description.  He even bought me a round of beer, and I later returned the favor.  We talked baseball for the rest of the game, hoping to see a line drive bounce off the stomach of an unfazed Bartolo Colon.  We talked work, exchanged numbers with the chance of doing some business in the future.

Let’s rewind again, sometime in August 2011, when rideshare services did not yet exist.

On a similar type of business trip to Minneapolis, I called for a cab.  The driver’s name was Muhammad (4).  He ended up being one the most easiest guys I’ve ever talked to.  He knew I was from out of town before I even explained the reason for my business from the Giants baseball cap I had on.

Every time I asked the hotel to call for a cab, by sheer luck Muhammad ended up being my driver.  This happened for 3 days straight.

My ride was anywhere between 20-25 minutes to my destination, so it’s safe to say that I spent well over an hour of conversation with him in a span of a week.  It’s worth noting that I was in my mid to late twenties, and was absolutely convinced I knew everything.

I didn’t know shit.

But in these conversations with Muhammad were some of the most insightful takes on life. Multiple windows were being revealed, and both oxygen and light were being absorbed for the first time from various angles of my mind that I never thought existed.

The truth is, I still don’t know shit.  But I learned how to keep learning from Muhammad.  On my last cab ride I paid him substantially more than the meter read, though I assure you he was worth way more than I could have given him.

This is not about having lucky caps, or meeting the most pleasant strangers in the Minneapolis.  The point is this – you may be able to choose your own seats in life, but you’ll never be able to pick the people that end up sitting next to you.  Them doing so – whomever they are – proves that they’re on the same boat.  So do yourself, the people next to you, and the rest of the boat a favor – be Fonzie.

And you know what Fonzie (5) was like, yeah?

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Footnotes:

1  Put Your Head on my Shoulder – written and performed by Paul Anka (1959)

2  Bartolo Colon won the Cy Young award in the American League in 2005, with the Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim

3  Check them out here

4  The most common name in the world

5  Cool

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Sneakers

Recently, I’ve been purchasing shoes at an alarming rate, and for the life of me, I don’t know why (I lied, maybe I do.  But I won’t admit it here).   During my last year of college, I ignored all the pairs of Jordans I owned and gave my attention to one pair of Timberland boots, and one pair of PF Flyers.  Those two saw a lot of miles while my other sneakers collected dust and either found new owners or the bottom of old Avon boxes.

Fast forward to the current, I have three large bins over-filled with shoes – all collected within the last 12 months – and everything from boots, casual, dress, mostly sneakers, and my Currys.

And yes, my Currys deserve its own category.

I had the fortunate opportunity to disrupt this behavior from a kid that needed new shoes.  He has two younger siblings and they are all cared for by their single father.  Without going into the details, times have been rough for this family.  And I’ve been there before, literally in those same shoes.  Shoes with holes, without heels, without traction.  Shoes that should no longer be worn anymore.

The next day I went through my bins and pulled several pairs that were good for a growing 8th grader.  I had them delivered over to him, hoping it would suffice both his needs and wants.  What I appreciated most from this was having the feeling of not wanting anything back.  I’ve been buying one new pair after another, but on a drop of a dime I parted with some of them because kids deserve to run, catch, shoot, throw, and dive; they’re limited to those necessities without a simple pair of shoes.

A few days later I received very genuine letter of appreciation from him.  Before a tear could roll from my eye I’m reminded of a simple life rule I’ve adopted and lived by: don’t be the dick in the crowd that catches a foul ball and doesn’t give it to a kid.

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Letter received for the sneakers provided.

No matter what goals you are in pursuit of or what you live for, keep in mind that ever single thing you do make up the fabric that our youth will wear on their backs.  So feed tradition, teach compassion, encourage necessary mistakes, forgive faults, ignite success, instill better, laugh a lot, and love even more.

If we make enough of our own luck, they won’t be keeping any baseballs for themselves, either.

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Torture

I’m going to rant and vent at the same time. Let’s call this… rent. I’m going to rent. Or… vant. Whatever, you get me (either way I’m coining both terms).

I love baseball. I love the San Francisco Giants. I love the San Francisco Giants broadcast team. They’re the best in the business, and it’s not even close. But probably the worst thing they ever came up with – and I guess I’ll be looking straight at you, Duane Kuiper – is the whole Torture movement. To his credit, it has caught on very well amongst all levels of Giants fans.

And for the record, I’m not mad at him. Nor do I dislike or hate him for starting the movement. As fans, however, we should have known better to support it and feed it the gasoline that led it to grow into the ugly wildfire it has become.

I’m not one of the supporters of the Torture label, not even a little, and nor will I ever be. I cringe when I hear it, and I frown when I read it throughout the news and social medias.

“Torture” came about in 2010, the year the Giants won their first World Series in San Francisco. It was birthed when the marriage of our great pitching and just-good-enough timely hitting won us so many close ballgames.

But we won. We. Won! That is what I will never completely understand. Why is that torture when we earned that W? I love it when the Giants win, regardless if it’s a 10-2 laugher or a 1-0 nail biter. A win is a win and it’s a great feeling. How did that become torture?!

And against all odds (surprise, surprise) we are back in the postseason, trying to pull together and play the best baseball we can play for one magical month. And, without a hitch, the torture label re-surfaces from thousands of fans.

The other day, we won the Wild Card game in Pittsburgh. We won again today against an extremely tough Washington Nationals team for Game 1 of the NLDS. I will question once again – why is this torture when we’re winning ballgames?

I’ve been watching Giants Baseball for as long as I can remember, and that only really means that I hold a lot of memories with this team. And I’m going to take this moment to share some of those with you. Maybe, just maybe, you begin to re-think what you understand as torture –

1989 – The Giants and the A’s square off in the infamous Battle of the Bay World Series. Earthquake aside, the Giants get swept, and it was never close. And Jose Canseco did us with a mullet. TORTURE.

1992 – The franchise is poised to leave San Francisco for Tampa Bay. It wasn’t until Peter Magowan and other friends with fat wallets save the team and stay in SF. That waiting period before that decision was made… TORTURE.

1993 – The Giants win 102 games and don’t even make the playoffs, because the Atlanta Braves won 103. TORTURE.

1994 – Will Clark signs with the Texas Rangers. He was and still is my favorite ballplayer of all time. And to see him don another uniform other than the Giants was too painful. So I also became a Rangers fan as well. Then baseball as a whole decided to go on strike. TORTURE.

1996 – A 94-loss season. TORTURE.

1997 – The Giants get swept in the NLDS against the Florida Marlins. TORTURE.

1998/1999 – Mediocre seasons with no playoff appearances. TORTURE.

2000 – The Giants get eliminated by the New York Mets in 4 games in the NLDS. And Mike Piazza did us with a mullet. TORTURE.

2001 – After clawing through injuries, the Giants come up short against the Arizona Diamondbacks and watch October baseball on their couches at home. TORTURE.

2002 – The Giants make their first World Series appearance since 1989 and lose in 7 games against the Anaheim Angels and a rally monkey. TORTURE.

2003 – We meet the Florida Marlins once more in the NLDS and we are eliminated in 4 games in bone-crushing fashion when, in the final play, JT Snow is out at the plate after a clean collision with Ivan Rodriguez, who was able to hold onto the baseball. TORTURE.

2004 – The Dodgers eliminate the Giants in playoff contention when Steve Finley hits a grand slam to seal our fate for October-less baseball. TORTURE.

2005/2006/2007/2008 – Four straight severely losing seasons. Emphasis on severe, and emphasis on emphasis. TORTURE, and emphasis on TORTURE.

2011 – A collision with Scott Cousins at the plate takes Buster Posey out for the season that could have ended his then young(er) career. TORTURE.

Seriously, people. If you’re a Giants fan, re-think what you call torture. If you truly believe that 2010, 2012, and the current 2014 are “torturous” seasons, you either have unattainable standards of a 162-0 season along with clean sweep of 11-0 in the playoffs, or you were given an antonym book by someone who lied to you and told you it was a dictionary.

I’ll let you borrow my 2002 World Series DVD if you need a reminder what real torture is.

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